Recognize Yourself? No Names, Please…

by Jerry Stern
Webmaster, PC410.com
Westminster Maryland 21157

Reprint, from the February 2010 issue of ASPects

Between my various webmaster tasks and the editor job here at ASPects, each month I accumulate nearly a thousand press releases, either in full or as daily summaries. Sometimes, they’re from ASP members, or newsy and good, and they’ll end up online or in ASPects. Most don’t approach that standard. Mostly, they’re formula: “varCompany, varCity, announced the availability of varProduct varVersion, the industry-leading application that is clearly the best thing since the invention of the cracker barrel.” Frequently, they’re not remotely usable for anything but showing you what the authors did wrong. Let’s look at a handful.

Miss: ‘(product name) with a 40% off Discount: Accurate Weather Forecast on the Screen of Your PDA!’

The coupon appeared in the first paragraph, expiring 11 days later. OK, it’s a Windows Mobile app, so maybe the assumption that the press release won’t go out in actual ink is justified. But my publications, online or PDF, are good for more than 11 days, so this one isn’t publishable. Maybe, just maybe, I’d post it online if the coupon was good for 90 days, not in the headline, and not in the lead paragraph. But this one is just outdated on arrival.

Miss: ‘(product name)–Personalized Calendars of Any Size for You and Your Friends!’

As compared to making them for your enemies and random bureaucrats? And the press release continues, with a description of features that every calendar program has, but the headline feature “of any size” is pushed down to the middle of paragraph 3, where it can handle formats “from pocket-size to pin-up.” No additional details. Hmm. With picture? Not? And how does that come out of the printer, exactly? A press release should be news. A bullet list of the competition’s features, and a headline with weak follow-up and no detail isn’t news; it’s barely a hint.

Hit: “Kanguru Defender Elite Safe from Security Flaw Discovered in Other Encrypted Flash Drives”
If I read nothing else, I’ve already gotten the message. If I know the news headline of a few weeks back, I know that the ‘other’ drives had good encryption, but very bad implementation with a well-known default password. It’s newsy; just barely short enough. And then there’s the rest of the press release: short, newsy, and only the last third covers product features.
Online here: http://www.softwarekb.com/news/2010/01/06/kanguru/

Miss: ‘Holiday Discount on (product name): Classic Tower Defense Game at Rock Bottom Price’

Sounds OK, except the discount for “Christmas and New Year” arrived in a press release dated January 15th.

Hit: “Taxes, Refinancing and Mortgage Modification: Four Useful Tips”

It’s a news lead and a news story. The first mention of the software name isn’t until the second paragraph. This press release could be news filler in nearly any general-interest publication; there’s no trace of hype or formula writing at all.
Online here:
http://www.softwarekb.com/news/2010/01/23/taxes/

Miss: “Maveric Systems Hosts CXO Software Testing Summit in Riyadh”

Headline isn’t bad, nothing exciting. But the press release was sent on Saturday, January 23rd, for a January 27th event–that’s two business days lead-time, for a “by-invitation” event. Why bother to announce it?

Miss: “HI’s 3D Rendering Engine “MascotCapsule(R) V3″ Is Adopted for Capcom’s Action Video Game “Ghost’n Goblins(TM) Gold
Knights” for iPhone(R) and iPod(R)touch”

Let’s see, that’s four trademark characters in the headline, with two sets of embedded quotes. Lots of pain for any potential editor to deal with… This doesn’t inspire confidence. Let’s look at the lead paragraph:

“TOKYO–(BUSINESS WIRE)–HI CORPORATION (JASDAQ:3846)(ISIN:JP3160860007)(Headquarters:Tokyo, Japan; President and CEO: Kazuo Kawabata; hereinafter “HI”) announced today that HI’s 3D rendering engine “MascotCapsule V3″ (hereinafter “V3″) has been
adopted by Capcom Co., Ltd. (Headquarters: Osaka, Japan; President and COO; Haruhiro Tsujimoto; hereinafter “Capcom”) for their game “Ghost’n Goblins™ Gold Knights” developed for “iPhone” and “iPod touch” produced by Apple Inc. (Headquarters: Cupertino, California, United States; CEO: Steve Jobs).”

Wow. All the stock market symbols, product names and their nicknames, presidents, CEOs, company cities, wow. It’s all there. Big-Time name dropper, and massively unreadable. Now if there was any clue of why the product is so special, maybe it would be actual news.

Jerry Stern is the editor of ASPects, the ASP’s Coordinator of Anti-Spyware Operations, runs Startupware.com and
WordPerfect.org, and is online from Westminster Maryland at www.sciencetranslations.com.